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Can I Get My Spouse to Mediate?

Posted By Center for Mediated Divorce || 30-Sep-2015

When it comes to the mediated divorce process, it is impossible to force a resistant spouse into the process. The whole point of mediate is to find agreement and compromise through discussion, which defeats the purpose if you are being forced to do so. Even though you can’t make your spouse participate, you can persuade them to. Our Irvine divorce mediation lawyer shares some ways that you can help convince your spouse that the mediated process might be a better solution when divorcing.

There are simple ways you can persuade your spouse into mediation, like:

  • Giving them more information about the mediation process – sometimes knowledge and facts can be your strongest weapon. There is a possibility that the reason your spouse is hesitant about mediation is because they don’t fully understand what it is or how it works. Show them some informative websites or blogs about the process and why many couples are opting for mediation.
  • Giving them the “easy way” vs. the “hard way” talk – As cliché as it sounds, the “easy way, hard way” talk does work at times. Showing your spouse their options and highlighting the benefits of mediating can help guide them towards wanting to choose the easy way. Also, framing the talk to make it sound like they are the ones choosing could give them a sense of power and control that is beneficial to you.
  • Being an example of compliance – when beginning the first steps of your divorce, it is important to remember that you can demonstrate through action. Don’t approach the process with hostility or stubbornness. Talk with your spouse and be willing to see things from their side. If you can demonstrate that you can play well with others, maybe your spouse will notice and be willing to try mediate.
  • Choosing the right attorney – Choosing an attorney that has been trained in mediation is a key element to helping persuade your spouse. A skilled divorce mediation lawyer can send your spouse a non-antagonistic letter requesting mediation. By staying professional and responsive, your divorce attorney can demonstrate how the process will proceed through action.

If you are ready to begin your mediated divorce in Irvine or have questions about the process, contact the Center for Mediated Divorce at (714) 706-3992 today!

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